It's that time of year again- time to not get swept up in MAGICAL THINKING or CYNICISM. How do I avoid that, you might ask? Well, take stock, evaluate, and make a plan. Listen to Holidays Survival Tips & Tricks part 1 And remember you are not alone in the struggle to be safe, find joy and peace, and not get manipulated this season. I also have posts from last year that may come in handy. Take care of yourself! #soulcarewithangiefadelpodcast #soulcarewithangiefadelpodcast #hol
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I have been spending a lot of time in reflection since Thanksgiving. Time looking at all of my best laid plans for a toxic free holiday... Boundaries✓ Anger processing✓ Grief given space✓ Hard conversation had✓ Ways out considered✓ Tears shed✓ Then during yoga this morning deep into a child's pose the tears started to flow. And I realized I am exhausted! From… Being Brave Setting boundaries Making safe plans Having hard conversations with my kids about inevitable weird family
All of us have someone who around the holidays or at every family function pushes our buttons/safety. Maybe this person has a bit to much to drink and they get into politics, or they feel like they know how you should be living and they think their way is the right way.
Maybe they are "well meaning" (whatever the hell that means) and just can't keep their mouths shut. Whatever it is???
Aunt Astrid, asking again why your not married or when your going to start having kids.
Whether you have the best family, friends, and colleges the world has to offer, this time of year can still be complicated and painful for so many of us. The pressure to do more! Be more! Spend more! And pretend that everything is alright is at an all-time high. It doesn't matter what you are celebrating Hanukkah, Kwanza, Christmas, Lohri, Winter Solstice or all of the above it is a time for most of us to face our own inner demons plus the ones we were born into. I have spent
What does it mean to be believed! To have someone really believe you without you having to justify any part of your story or make right someone else's story. I can tell you what it is like to believed and not believed. Let me start with the most painful of the two. Not being believed! What people are actually saying without saying it is- You are a liar! That the pain and trauma that you lived through, you should get over it! Sometimes if they are religious they say, you need
It has been my habit for many years to put out some kind of holiday survival guide. For myself, for the community I used to lead, my clients, and friends. It's not that I am an expert in emotional intelligence, but I can hold my own and thanks to my family of origin I have had more than my fair share of learning opportunities around holiday disfunction. When I do this every year it is a reminder for me to pay attention, to notice my emotional temperature, and try to not set m
The only thing I know how to write is my own experience. I can make assumptions about yours and I might be right 9 out of 10 times, but when I write my truth, that is where the magic happens. I am a survivor. A survivor of neglect and abuse and far too much growing up before my time with a hefty dollop of family denial on top just to make sure nobody really knew what was going on. The unique truth of my upbringing has shaped who I am. It has taken a long time (in the midst o