The holidays can be packed with so much joy time with friends, chosen family, fun activities, but it can also be fraught with tricky and painful encounters - reminders that people don’t believe we should be able to live the way we live and love the way we love. This is B.S. but rejection is still rejection and it hurts especially when it’s from the people that helped bring us into the world.
We can’t change them but we can protect ourselves from their damage.
Here are some suggestions: *Don’t go this year. Take a pass, go on a trip, make plans that are not flexible. See how it feels to be separate from it for one Season. Who knows maybe you’ll love the freedom?
*Book end your visit. Have plans beforehand that get you there a little late and have plans to leave early. Have a friend call with an emergency and check in to see how you’re really doing. If it’s going well you can “cancel” those imaginary plans and stay longer or if not leave for safer people and places.
*Bring a friend with you! Preferably someone who calls bullshit (often it’s difficult to see what’s happening to us in places that we grew up in, places and people that helped shape us). Our friends can remind us when something is manipulative, passive aggressive, gaslighting, etc.
Who you are is beautiful! Who you are is worth celebrating! Who you are is worth knowing! Celebrate who you are this holiday season!