One of the hardest things for me to do (and I'm guessing I'm not alone in this) is to show up for myself. It is so much easier for me to show up for you than to authentically (without the harsh critic beating me up) show up for me.
Maybe this is rooted in some fucked up puritanical roots or was instilled in me by my evangelical upbringing but showing up for myself is hard and often comes as an afterthought to all the things that need doing.
So my mantra this week is to Show Up For Myself in the most loving way I can. Giving myself what I need, what I deserve, and maybe even what I want. I wish this was easy that my automatic stance was - what do you need? And without judgment giving it to myself.
This is similar to the grooming I've talked about before. The idea is that some of us have been taught/groomed to not listen, pay attention, attend to, give, or have the right to show up for ourselves and our own needs. That giving attention and care to ourselves is selfish, greedy, even narcissistic. And over the years this grooming has become rote.
But much like loving ourselves helps us love others showing up for ourselves without judgment helps us have the reserves to show up fully for others and also know when it's not healthy for us to show up. I think this showing up is another way to learn healthy internal and external boundaries. We won't get it right every time. We will sometimes error on the side of putting ourselves first when there is a real need for support with our families, friends, and communities or we will put others before ourselves at the expense of ourselves and our needs. But perfection isn't the goal listening to ourselves with love is. And moving forward in a more symbiotic relationship with ourselves, others, and our world is.
So Show Up for yourself as fully, authentically, and unapologetically as you can and we will figure this out together.
Love,
Angie
